Wednesday, September 9, 2009

Cell Phone Catch 22

A Long Island man, who donated his kidney to his wife, now wants it back as part of the divorce.
These are my people. Why I moved.
Day 62 l :6:00am class
ruined by a cell phone, buzzing on silent for one entire hour.
Maybe the phone owner was waiting for a kidney?
"Your kidney has arrived, the transplant team is in place, you must get to the hospital within 30 minute or you loose it to someone on site.
"sorry I was at yoga, and I did not want to answer my phone."
Let's shoot the phone owner!
Answer the phone or turn it off.
Who needs to bring your cell phone into a yoga studio?
Falling out of pose with each annoying "silent" alarm of the cell phone. Buzz buzz.
Sound's like Lilliputians hacking bodies with tiny chain saws
throwing body parts into a wood chipper.
How would Fargo play with Lilliputians in it?
If we actually had real Lilliputians.
Buzz buzz, fall fall, which person is it in this room
that I actually want to kill?
Buzz Buzz, Fall Fall.
I don't know just shoot them all.
Buzz Buzz, fall fall, tiny people would be good at chopping off toes. Too bad you did not get that kidney in time. Rotten toes is diabetes not renal failure. Buzz buzz, fall fall . LET IT GO. It doesn't matter at all. Buzz buzz, fall, fall, Hey Yossarian, shoot the cell phone commandeer. Yossarian, buzz buzz fall fall, dive bomb the cell phone owner, yoga mat and all. It is the only way to honor the bovine within you. Yossarian? Shoot the cell phone commandeer. Buzz buzz, fall fall. It's a tiny sound, after all. I am out of kibble, will the dog starve? which is the most important thing to do today? The client did not call. I did not work last night. Buzz buzz, fall fall, yoga does not work after all.


Yoga tip of the day: no gun phones in the studio. It is a real trick to hold your ankles, arms, chin up, heels up, knees bent with murderous intent.

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